As iF i CARE^^

    On the 22nd of April.. my first paper came and well i did my best.. and to hell with it

    The best part is the night of the day… i went to DIT2 party at Hartamas (not sure … its right according to my homie) and its a pub I think… called Lubang Hitam where the leng luis dun serve you.. The pizza there is nice cos its cheesy…

    But the main course is still the Black Label.. yeah baby 370 a bottle.. we opened two and it taste damn nice.. Its kinda rough the first glass and the following glasses taste like heaven…

    Not many drink a lot since some of the drive and the man of the night goes to big crab for being the most hillarious out of them all and I was the earliest to be knocked down.. yeah yeah I know I have low alcoholic endurance but at least I din really get drunk.. I vomit twice to prevent that… seesh… its disgusting though. I became Datuk Guan at the first hour.. what do you expect…. I am a good guy who seldom touch alcohol.. Ahukkk

    Well thanks to an experienced dude I dun really get hangover in fact I went to group study the next day and finished my studies.. though I have a slight headache.. Overall cost 90.. things vomited out more or less the contents paid with the 90 dollars… shucks….

    Well that is all for today… till then have a good day blog.. i know no one visit u since u got a lame author.. bear with it fucker…

long time since the last post.. but the hell with it.. nobody read this blog oso

well yesterday, 9th april, i jumped approximately 5 meter vertically…. kinda stupid ehh.. yeah yeah i regret it now… so er er and the doctor says there is nothing much to it. He says that i am a lucky jackass… When i told him he was shocked and the laugh a little with the smirk hanging on his face (cheecky fella) and he says i can jump again..

It’s a miracle really, no fracture, just some nerval damages which will heal in time.. god bless me…

The time i jumped, i feel the floor immediately and i felt that i  have my energy drained (mainly from my legs) from the impact and my pantat tooo.. pain without love….

The worst follow i suffer minor concussion i think.. i lose conciousness by simply walking… but the blur vision is kinda cool… something like in NFS but much more blur as you walk.. once in a life time experience…

Well I am sorry that i did such stupid acts and for my roommate to lose 20 bucks..hehe and thanks for the meal…

That’s all for todays crap.. wish to go to aus… haih and for readers, if there is any, dun jump 6 meter if u wanna suicide… triple the height for 100% insurance for ticket to hell..

Its been 19 years of my life~~ ups and downs that i’ve been through are kinda the things that fucked me up nicely~~

i made promises which i cannot fulfill~~ leaving thsoe with hopes filled themselves with disappointment…
This is what made a loser that you can anywhere~~ making excuses for themselves.. i did with cigarettes.. I had the excuse that nothing motivates me but in the end~~ i just cant let it go for the sake of those i promised.. even if you promised, tried and die by doing so, nothing will change if you can’t give them with anything~~ icant give anyone anything~~ sounds like a parasite~~ damn fucking lame… knn

i cant even set my mind straight doing things i need to… i am not even half a considerate person~~ i cant see wat others feel as of my actions… its kinda sad… i realize but i think myself tomorrow wont be able to stick with it.. that’s the kinda bastard i am… the sorrow of taking smokes reminded me of my dearest things which i am slipping them through~~ i know.. i am lame.. so wat~~ hehe

those that i made such fucking unreliable promises.. dun fucking trust me~~ you will end up laughing to death… in a nice way that is.. well this is my part of the story~~ for today……

Everyday is like a video repeating itself to me. I do the same fucking thing everyday.. by the way~~ i havent smoke for the last 72 hours or more i think~~ makes me all cold and tense up with no motivation to start my life..

I start my day from bed and bath which causes me extreme cold conditions in the morning for some reason~~ i am feeling dang cold even now… Its a curse i tell ya.. nicotine keeps u warm and comfy but sometimes fucks the shit out of yer life~~

Today i went to jj again and like rob up my bro’s wallet for a meal at nandos and then tapau some choc indulgance~~ yum yum~~The slice is still in my fridge which i saved up for later i guess~~

my hair is starting to bug me and each and every fucking strands is like begging me to cut them short~~ will be visitin nicole soon~~ in a months time i guess~~ kannia eh… i think i dun wan cut meh~~ the wallet dun let me only.. T.T

well i got no more topic to fill and my fingers just got fucked up from my guitar playing ( which has not improve even in the slightest way )

well that’s all the shit there~~ peacing out yo~~

* sorry for all the obscene words since its been a while that i fucked up my post~~ yeah baby gotta prep for it~~ the fore play and all.. cant miss it out hehe..

Yesterday , 19th i think, i skipped some lesson and went to mid valley~~ hehe ~~ well nothing to do really. just met some old friends ah ni and kaka~~ long time din see them and new ones and was stuffed in a lot hell of food with a toilet brand T-shirt in my bag hehe… i don’t remember well and one thing for sure is that i lost quite a sum of cash… nuuuuuuu… After dinner around 7.30~8.00.. i dismissed myself due to fatigue and my age is getting me there.. awwww.. then i went to find Nicole for a trim and that lasted about an hour since she is busy…

Then after the trim was about 10 where i joined my friends to TBR for some games till 3.00~~ nuuuuuuu lost quite too much of a cash for 2 days….. the god will not forgive me i kow and allah would not bless me and i am sure of it but jesus will be by my side~~ thx

Around 3.30 me and pm reached home but i was wobbling around ~~ the cigs will kill me one day ~~ I was too lazy to bath but the odour was too much to bear so i had no choice~~ I was like battling fatigue~~ at 4 i get my Z’s with uncle Chow~~ din see him a lot during classes now except the faint image of him during mass media law classes~~ hehe

So well then for now i am going to find unvle Chow again to get some fish~~ haha

Back to sandakan for about 1 and half weeks and still nothing to do. All I can do is sit in front of the computer unless i am out~~ haha. And Sandakan is really transforming into a nature city. Water and electricity shortage happens thrice a week. I think the engineers smeared some sperm at the generators whiole Ahem.

My parents haven’t see me for half a year and they feed er er no stuff me with food. They make extra force me to eat it all.. haha but but i aint got any weight difference.. mayb a little.. mayb.

Its boring cos all my friends are either MIA or taking STPM soon~~ can’tbother them too much right? Sien arrrr.

But well I finally tuned my guitar to a playable tuning so its alright~~ But this guitar damn hard to press~~ the strings too high~~ my hands ache all over~~ hehe.

Haih and onemanga releases new reborn chapters again!! Thanks OM ><

I WISH i have a girlfriend BUT i would be castraded even before sleeping her and bankrupt even before getting her.. that is wat i learned in life

I WISH i have talent BUT i ended up in a school where u rely on your talent and do everything yourself with a dim guidance from shitty lecturer who claimed to be professional in ass making my freaking hole~~ i dont have much talent so please dont guide me to a pit u shitty guides… this is wat i experience in life

I WISH i have luck BUT i ended up having having shitty lucks thanks to some god which were claimed to exist… if you the god are reading ask yourself what you gave me.. fame? girl? money? none!! but i thank you at least for giving good friends and family… this is what i lived in my life

I WISH i had time BUT i ended up shortenin my life smokin and thanks to those freakin ass i ended up maturing at an amazing rate.. turning 70 soon… this is wat i am going throuhgh in my life

I WISH i had money BUT the cash never came.. it only goes out.. i wan to support my wife os hard like this… lou pih zai~~ wtf illusions *gasp*.. the ass funded from my savngs are not reclaimable and the money i stocked are for education purpose anyway so sigh~~ nothing personal but life sucks and i lost money for buying extra materials i thought needed ~~ sien sien… this is how i use money in my life

I WISH i have some brain BUT i ended rotting it in the abyss and my knowledge fades with my age coming fast.. i have short termed ass memory contrast to my noble pole~~ i am no good in IQ or crammin~~ no good in arithmetics~~ zero creativity~~ zero anticipation and planning~~zero consideration and being a kind considerate ass.. what is this world anyway.. this is what i have been using my brain for through my life

YOU CAN ALL SEE ME PIK CIK~~ PCK THE THINGS I OSO GOT LEARN NOW~~ SIEN SIEN~~ WISH I CAN GO BACK HOME AND SLEEP AND DO NOTHING AND YAM CHA A LITTLE~~ FLIRT WITH SOME CUTE CUTE GIRLS~~ THAT”S ALL I WANTED SO GOD (IF YOU ARE READING THIS BLOG BY ANY FUCKING CHANCE) GIVE A A SMOOTH HAPPY LIFE.. WHO CARES ABOUT MONEY AND FAME WHEN I HAVE SMOOTH FINANCIAL AND A CUTER WITH WITH A HAPPY FAMILY IN ALL GREEN CONDITION~~ BE RESPONSIBLE YOU JERK~~ DONT PLAY WITH LIVES YOU HAD GIVEN YOU YOU…SIGH~~

What am I? useless? Or wost than useless? or just another existance that aint worth a shit? Who cares as long as i have a smooth life with no worries~~

That is all the fucking things for now.. so until then there and after~~ signin off

FUCK!!!
I am very fuckingly tired
For some fucking reason
Which i do not fuckingly know…

FUCK!!
I had fucking time to trim my fucking hair
Dun tok about the fucking time i dun even fuckingly have the money.

FUCK!!!
Yesterday i was really fucking happy.. my friends remebered my fucking birthday.
I fuckingly thank you guys.. it was touchin..^^

FUCK!!
And fucking DOTA yesterday cos casualties among the female of class D1.
Fucking pawned I am then i fuckingly pawned others…
Then many fuckers died… in the end we all aimed eric cos his random fucking taufu all the time.
Dun fucking know y..dun fucking ask me…
The names used by daniel and nam fong fucking got fucking aura.. fuck all us.. fuck la…
But nasib they fuckingly got pawned oso..if not all fuckingly fight foir the names only…

FUCK!!!
Now I am fucking 19 and a day old..
Kinda fuck hanging in the middle…
With the fucking stamina which fuckingly fading away..
Now my eyes fuckingly giving up on me..
Unfuckingnately i got some asses to show tomolo to the fucking lecturers… fuck la….
And the fucking plant.. how the fuck do i draw the fucking pant…
My eyes not fucking microscope la~~ susah..

FUCK!!
Haih i think i fuckingly get some fucking shut eye sin loe…
Fuck ya’all next time… till then fuckers haha

01. Plain stupid shit
02. I am not motivated by the surrounding shits
03. Rebellious
04. I am a pale looking zombie
05. I have thick lips(not my fault..it’s genetic)
06. Too care free
07. Not handsome (sorry leng luis)
08. Have a bad mouth and language probs
09. Two faced
10. Always come in the wrong time at a wromg place

Sorry to all my friends for having to bear with shits like me… sorry for the world for spoiling ur scene… Sorry to the people who lived on earth for threading the same earth as you all… mcb GOD!!!!!!!!

Its been a long time since I was into this shit..
Well first of all i would like to make a hard commitment here… I WILL STOP SMOKING EVENTUALLY!!!!
Next are the craps

Things are getting out of hand lately… My financial problem may come again as that Kasturi wanted some kinda high quality drawing block whick fuck the nerve off my wallet.

I chatted with gwai gwai today. She was quite into her dream which is quite noble compared to the shits I have been doing. Its been a long time though since I had chatted with her but its good to kknow taht she is doing well… >< have faith in ur abilities~~

Next is that I’ve been thinking since when did I stop drawing… Actually I have dulled my senses in that. Maybe its beace of the recent upheavel inside my brain which toss myself around the endless despair~~

Actually I am not sure what I have been thinking lately

Future? ~ quite the shit of surviving in the society

Love lives? ~stopped for millenias if not for centuries

Stupid stuff and theories of existance? ~frequently as to wonder if the domain of gods ever existed

Well to sum it up my life have been fucked up like shit with no aim of my life or a strong will and determination to stand firm on the choiches i”ve made… My heart is wavering and a dream that I din’t even take for real is running away from my grasp.. What should I do once I graduated? Continue study or to start working? Things are too confusing for a mere mortal such as I to handle.. far too much.

God if you ever existed forgive thy foolish creations and hold dear to them before they end up killing themselves for faith for thy existance, thy teachings wavers in most humans and that is why thy nemesis exists in each of us~ Guide them o great one and never shalt thy bring wrath to helpless creatures as us. Thou hath created us and thou art taketh care of thy beings~ US

Well that concludes the fucking blashphemy this time until then
BYEEE